In blogging, as in all relationships, there can come a point where you haven't had a decent conversation for so long that you just don't know where to begin. My posting tends to be light in the summer anyway, when I take a break from work and from spending much time at a desk or computer. This summer was no exception, and then when I went back to work I was busy and the thought of going back to fill you in on my summer activities felt too...something. Overwhelming is too strong a word, but a minor version of that.
So anyway, I did some stuff over the summer. It was nice and not particularly newsworthy: beach, family reunion, hanging out with the kids, swimming, etc. Then in August I came back to work and have been pretty much running ever since. For the first time in my twelve years of teaching, I teach six 48-minute classes, one after the other, with only a 30-minute break for lunch until last period, when I have planning. This is in stark contrast to the 90-minute blocks we did last year, four per day. I now see 90 kids by 10:00 am. My total for the day is 163 kids in six hours, then a 48-minute planning period. It's not awful, but it's pretty hectic. So there's that. I'm teaching mostly juniors this year, too, which it turns out I like. American lit is really more to my tatse. So are juniors. Who knew?
My own kids are good. School is going well for all of them. Genevieve only channels Satan occasionally now instead of five times a day, which is nice. Somerset and Miss M both celebrated birthdays in the past few weeks, which we celebrated by throwing them an awesome (if I do say so myself) carnival-themed birthday party in the yard this past weekend. I even had a craft table, people. I ordered balloons and cakes in advance. This is huge! I was proud of myself and SAM for pulling it all together so well. Somerset turned 8 (Miss M is now 7) and got her ears pierced as her gift, per her request. I really never had a set age in mind for this particular milestone; I was just waiting for her to want it and be able to take care of them as they heal. So far so good.
On a personal note, I'm a little off my game lately. A period of chronic exhaustion that seemed untouched by any amount of sleep has pushed me back into the arms of my demon lover, caffeine. My emotions are running a little flat except when they spike into anger. I've been struggling with some hormonal imbalance for months now (one indicator being the fact that at least half my hair fell out over the summer so I'm going to have to cut it), and I don't know how to fix that. I do know that I need to find something that will recharge me both mentally and physically. I'm thinking maybe something like this. Because I am not in any way spiritual, (which I'm totally okay with, really!), I forget that most people do some sort of mental maintenance on a regular basis. Sometimes I'm good about that whole being in the moment and finding joy in the details thing, but sometimes that wears thin and I find myself where I am now: Depletionville. Flatland. Maybe writing here again will be a stop on the way back.
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3 comments:
When I clicked over to the link, I read that as Erotic Dance and couldn't figure out why a bunch of kids were in the photo.
Alex is taking American Lit this year, it'll be interesting to compare what he's reading to what you're assigning.
I'm sorry you're feeling blah and flat, I hope you do find something to get you back in the game. But hormonal imbalances suck. I can't believe how crazy I was for like over a year with whatever the hell was going on with my hormones. I feel for you, I really do.
Umm... I step in here with some trepidation, as an occasional reader of your blog.... It seems pretty obvious that there may be all sorts of pressures going on, from work demands as you describe, to family demands, and whatever the chemistry issues are that affected your hair condition -- but can I make one tiny suggestion that might seem remote or irrelevant (at first)? What about changing the stuff you read for fun? It just doesn't seem like much of it could be remotely satisfying to one's soul, IMO. Of course, that is JMO. Still, a thought I had before reading this entry.
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